just another day at the office...

RIIINNNG!!! RIIINNNG!!!

Receptionist in background, "Corporate accounts payable, Nina speaking, juuuust a moment!"
I'm reminded of office space every time the front desk phone rings. "Guest services, this is Ben, and how may I help you?" I repeat that mindless phrase hundreds of times a day. It's so mindless; I've literally answered my cell phone that way. Sometimes I catch myself in time, and all the other times I try and play it off like who ever is calling me has the wrong number. In this day and age of modern communications that never works…ever.

Come to think of it office space is so like my life. I don't know if that should be depressing or not. I mean I sit in an office cubicle for about 9 hours a day doing what almost amounts to nothing. Jack. Didly. Squat. I'm usually running late because of Seattle's horrific traffic conditions. (I refuse to leave at 530 to make it to work by 8. Fuck that noise) I always come up the side staircase so no one sees me sneaking in. It usually isn't a problem, my boss isn't in until around 930 anyways. Ahh the benefits of mid level management! Hopefully one day I will arise to a position of such limited power! Don't get me started on the mediocre health benefits! If only I were so lucky…

Anyways I usually surf the net for a while, and pretty much zone out until lunch. After lunch I like to snag a sales reports binder, open it up in front of me on my desk, put my head in my hand and fall asleep. To the unsuspecting observer I look like I am deeply engrossed in my work. Heh, suckers! It usually takes about 20-30 minutes for me to sleep off lunch. One time I slept for a full hour and a half. When I woke up I had drool hanging from my mouth and forming a puddle on the page I was opened to. Oops! I've never been caught doing this yet, and I'm kinda curious to see how long that will last. Knowing my luck, probably for quite some time.

I think people here are finally starting to figure out what a slacker I really am. Quite frankly im amazed I've kept up the illusion of being a hard worker for so long. I think it probably because im starting to care less and less. Don't get me wrong I actually like my job. Just not when it's so damned slow like this. The onset of the Christmas season should cure this up. Pretty soon ill be cursing my own existence as I work extended hours, photographing uncooperative people in shitty weather. Can you tell how excited I am?

So this totally kept me occupied for a solid half hour…only 54 more minutes till I'm outta this bitch. (Not that I'm counting or anything)

mindless ramblings of a sleep deprived idiot

Its late. I'm tired. I have to get up early tomorrow. I'm blasting music in an empty house. There is no one else here but me. Where is everyone? I seriously have no idea where my family is. Ahh communication at its finest.Odds are this situation is being played out in millions of homes across America. Aren't we just the perfect model of George Bush's Christian conservative family values? The functionality of disfunctionality continually amazes me.

Speaking of politics, as I'm typing this I'm seeing bulletins crop up about how great it is that the democrats are regaining control in the House and the Senate. Wow, who gives a shit? I fucking don't. As far as I'm concerned they are gunna fuck shit up just as bad as the republicans did, just in a different way. There isnt much difference between the two parties either. The way I see it democrats are just spineless republicans at best. At least a republican will be up front about you getting the shaft. Neither parties represent average Americans anymore. We need a strong third party in America.

Damn, what a tangent that was. I'm freaking bushed. I'm willing to bet that's why I'm not making a lick of sense. You know that point where you're about to drop dead from utter exhaustion? That point where your eyelids weigh a million tons but you cant sleep a wink? That's about where I am right now. I can't seem to turn my brain off. Tomorrow is going to be fun. What the hell, what's another sleep deprived, caffeine fueled workday? If only coke were still legal like back in the early 1900's. They could offer it from vending machines just like its liquidy carbonated cousin. Reminds me of that episode of futurama where off in the corner of the scene a vending machine advertising "Refreshing Crack" breaks down on a guy right as he's trying to score his fix. Hilarious. Bender is my fucking hero.

Random person (Fry maybe? dont remember): "Why does a robot need to drink alcohol?" Bender:"Because it powers my fuel cells"
Random person: "So why are you smoking a cigar?"
Bender: "Because it makes me look cool!"

I was freaking ecstatic when I heard FOX was bringing that show back.